Just curious, my friend just got a formal letter from somewhat dissent school, strongly suggesting to tip the teachers – is that a norm or exception just sounds wrong.
I know they have been giving money to the teachers/school once in a while for Christmas etc.

You mean in addition to the apple?

My son attends the 92Y Summer Camp and I received a letter that said "since many of you have asked....."
I don't belive anyone actually asked but this was a clever way to ask for a tip. It never would have occured to me to tip a counselor since I assume they do get paid a salary unlike a waitress for example. At close to $1000 per week to attend I would think their staff was paid competitively and they are not relying on tips.

it was private school and wasn't for the grade, just thought the school was out of place. It doesn't create healthy environment. The letter started the same way.. I guess it's standard

I have to say that I find it rather incredible how many people I am told I am supposed to tip in the US (mostly on SE). Its really bizarre. Basically, any person I interact with who works in any service industry I am apparently supposed to tip. Does anyone just work without expecting a tip and you know, the fee you pay for said service is what pays their salary? Reminds me a bit of Egypt where everyone expects some Baksheesh. I am amazed that a school would write a letter like this - incredibly inappropriate.

@Ottawa - Totally agreed. The tipping culture is getting out of control. It's particularly odious when you're expected to tip someone who is already better-compensated than you are. Then it feels not like a generous gesture, but a kind of extortion.

You're dreaming if this is merely a U.S. phenomenon. Teachers get $ gifts in Canada as well (public and private).

NYC1023 you are so wrong. You are not allowed (parents specificallyy told you absolutely cannot) give teachers a small gift at christmas, as it sets parents apart. At most, when it was allowed parents would maybe give a $20 giftcard to Tim Hortons. But tipping - never.

we give a gift card to Staples to our kids teachers (public school). it is not for a "tip" but for the supplies that they end up buying out of pocket. it may incourage the teacher to buy something they thought was too much to spend.

A letter from a school directing parents to give money to teachers in the form of 'tips' seem highly unlikely. Schools will try to influence you to donate money over and over again but in the format of organized fund raising where the school controls the funds. Any private school that was asking for tip money would soon come under fire. In the public arena it would be a-blaze on the evening news. If you want to influence your child's teacher with $$$ there is always some parent with more money. I prefer obtaining photos of the teachers in compromising positions coupled with blackmail as a means of influence. If no photos are available I just aquire their college transcripts. It's cheaper, easier, and yields a more consistant result.

In the suburbs we gave holiday gifts, I'd have to find out what the limit was, maybe $20.

caonima, when did dementia start setting in? full scale yet? contribute to ongoing research for human genome. your only viable hope since lobotomy is so 1970's.

hows life alan?

hahahaha. liked your link - all good on my side. happy to see some of the OG posters back here again.

In NYC, what I've experienced:

1) Camps - very common for camps to send out a letter to parents one or two weeks before the end of camp with tipping amount suggestions. It's not a request to tip, but they imply that they do so because otherwise they would be bombarded by parents asking the camp. My children go to a camp, and I tip the suggested amounts.

2) Public schools - neither the PTA nor the administration EVER send out any tipping letters or emails or any correspondence about tipping or teacher gifts.

However, it is very common for a class to get together and pool $ anonymously twice annually for a gift to teacher, aide/s and teachers for art/science/gym/music/etc. This is not encouraged or endorsed by PTA, but it happens. It's anonymous, and if I were to get a whiff of any preferential treatment, not something I would participate in. I give what I want to give and I always give.

Private preschools - the administration & parent association ask for twice yearly donations from parents. I am ambiguous about this, and don't like giving. However, I recognize that private preschool teachers are paid very, very little and have little job security - so I give.

In southern Ontario:

1) Camps - I would suspect that camps like Arowhon, Taylor Stratten, etc. have tipping guidelines.

2) Public schools - don't know for sure, will email some friends. Think the concept of year end cash pools exist.

Yikes - you communist. But yes, I think a lot of the tipping is due to the knowledge of the gross discrepancies in salaries here.

I guess part of my confusion about tipping a teacher is that they do quite well where I'm from and it would be really awkward to tip someone who probably makes more than a lot of the parents.

It seems wildly inappropriate. Maybe you should suggest they get some ethics training.

Do bus drivers need to be tipped, if they are losing their pick?
http://www.nytimes.com/2013/01/28/nyregion/culture-of-nyc-school-bus-drivers-is-facing-upheaval.html?hp

"Union drivers earn $14 to $29 an hour, and work on a 40-hour-weekly schedule with overtime kicking in if a day exceeds 10 hours. Ms. Wensmann, a single mother of an 11-year-old daughter who lives in North Babylon, on Long Island, earns $42,000 a year driving her bus; the most senior drivers earn around $51,000. Many have second jobs.

But many also qualify for unemployment during summertime, because they are technically laid off then; for Ms. Wensmann, that brings in an additional $362 a week for eight weeks."

Our private preschool organizes 2 collections per year - suggested give is about $100/family - to be divided among teachers and staff. Any other gifts are STRONGLY discouraged and the admin says that if you must gift, it should be something your kid made HIMSELF (or herself!) for the teacher.

According to friends who are public school teachers,it is against the law to accept money or gifts from their students or their student's families. According to friends who are independent school teachers, gifts are discouraged, especially since the staff is very well paid now. (These are the prep schools charging 20 - 35K per student.)