Tipping- how did it go

LOL! happy holidays to you and yours. I got lots of handshakes and holiday wishes from the very pleasant (all year, not just Christmas) staff at my rental building.

lobster- when do you think we will get our thank you notes (LOL-this should get everyone going!)

I gave tips to 22 people who work in the bldg. Except for the super i gave them all the same ($20.) and they don't appear happy but I did what I could,especially since there were so many of them.

julia- you did the right thing. i know many people that gave that same range!

It would be helpful if building staff included an empty self addressed stamped envelope with their annual christmas greeting.

I agonized and agonized, then spent at least ten minutes trying to cram fifteen envelopes into the well-guarded locked box. THEN I noticed that most people were coming by and just putting one envelope into the box, so apparently the accepted practice in this building is to give a lump sum and let the super divide it up.

Lesson learned for next year.

I tipped a total of $350 for a 1br apartment with doorman in a large building. We do not use them much except for packages. They seemed to be happy.

guess i should give mine....
i tipped $125 for the doorman i see the most down to @25 for porters (name i have never seen before). Total amount approx $900. Very polite thank you when i handed to them but nothing else so no idea if they were happy or not.
on the flip side my dog walker brought the dog and me a very sweet personal gift and then practically ran after me later that day to thank me (after she opened her gift).

how do you go about tipping people you rarely see but provide good service? Still haven't given tips to some people at the garage, in the building, etc. and feel bad since it's already Christmas!

curious- perfectly ok to leave it with a super building manager ect. i use to wait to see everyone and had the same issue- i was holding on for tip up to the new year! then i saw lots of people giving them to the super.
in my new building it was the norm to give it to the building manager

thanks RE!

Im a concierge/doorman and I have to say I think things went well for me. I dont keep a running tab but it seemed like it was better than last year. Even had 3 housekeepers give me money which I tried to refuse. I have to say I am lucky to work at a building where 90% of the tenants are nice people. (and by nice I dont mean because of what they give me) So to all those who give to their staff I want to say thank you and you really do make a difference in our lives. We do aprreciate all you do for us.

kevin- others were kind enough to disclose what they gave so why don't you disclose the range and wahat you consider a "fair" tip, and none of this whatever people give i appreciate crap

Hey bubbles. If you had asked politely I would have disclosed my range. You said "none of this whatever people give I appreciate crap". Im sorry that you look at money differently than I do. I will tell you this. I did spend 20 minutes for an old lady after work yesterday putting her groceries away and making sure she was able to get to her room ok. She has MS and can barely stand. By the way, she gave me 10 dollars for xmas a few days previous.

kevin- you are full of it, i have been following your posts and you are completely disingenuous. you would never disclose your tips

you took a tip from the housekeepers, which is unprofessional in my opinion and you think you are a saint for helping someone less fortunate then you... and she only gave you 10 dollars, i help people all the time and would not take a penny. you should donate that 10 dollar to MS research in her name

Kevin, the spirit of these threads is to learn, ie how much, lump sum, how to give it ect. Many of us struggled to determine the right amount and we all tried to help with prior experience, i have lived in nyc 20 years and learn a little something every year. We all shared and opened up, so i will ask the same question as bubbles. Can you share the range, the norm and what you consider a good amount. We have been open, you can do the same. thank you

bubbles you are so wrong because I have in fact posted the info recently. Do you know me? You know I am disingenuous? Thats funny because you are the first person ever who has said that about me. oh I forgot you dont know me. First of all, I tried to refuse the Gift from the housekeepers. No I dont think I am a saint for helping that lady I was just proving my point that I appreciate whatever I get. Most workers would not go up after work if they had gotten 10 dollars. Heck some wouldnt go if they had gotten a thousand from her from xmas. Bubbles I think you are full of shit that you help people all the time with the attitude you just presented. Also can you read??? I said she gave me 10 dollars previously for xmas not for helping her with the groceries. It looks like someone didnt get any presents today and is very upset about it.

and btw- you don't know me so don't claim that i look at money differently then you do. how dare you make the presumption about me. i don't even know how you view it (other then you think it is your right to rec'v) so how do you know it's differnt.

i did see that the 10 dollars was for x-mas. take the 10 dollars and donate it to MS research.
and guess what buddy, i have helped people in my building with packages because the door men in my building are too arrogant to help an elderly couple or a pregnant women. someday i will be old and will need the help and i believe in karma- that is why i am cranky. it's all about the tips with you guys

and one last comment martyrs of martyrs you could have turned down the money... you could have said it was against building policy to accept gits from anyone other then building residence (and should be)

hey bubbles---you're going crazy about ten lousy dollars. fuck you.

Re 2009 no problem. As I have said before I work in a Park Ave coop with about 130 or so tenants. I have been there for appoxiamately 11 years as a doorman/concierge. We have a rather large staff. About 27. My range this year has been between 0 and 350. Out of the people who live there only 1 hasnt given. There are more who havent given but they are either doing renovations or havent lived there in a while. The 2 lowest have been 10$ and 15$. Everyone else has given a minimum of 25$. I would say the majority have given me 50$ or more. If I have some time later on in the week I could give a more detailed range. We write down what we get from each tenant so we have a list of who we have to thank.

guys, come on
i was hoping this could be a helpful thread.
enough!

You should never lump the whole group as 1. Just because you have seen staff not act appropriatley does not mean that all staff does that. Your taking your frustration out on me because of them????

Did you ever think that there was a reason those housekeepers felt compelled to give me something??? Others gave me candy and some made lunch. Should I have refused that too? You can only say no too many times before it gets uncomfortable.

precisely...

don't worry about bubbles. obviously not willing to be honest.

"i don't even know how you view it (other then you think it is your right to rec'v) so how do you know it's differnt" If you actually read what was written then you would have an idea of how I view money.

hey re2009: can you open up a little, share a little, let us know about your financial compensation? how much do you get?

i don't know yet columbia, will not know until feb or so..
and how will knowing help others in terms of the right amount to tip

presumptuous to ask .... right?

why is it ok to ask this poster? get real.

thank you kevin... i think that was very helpful info
many f us struggled to determine if we were in line, out of line so hearing this really helped.

no problem re2009 glad I could help.

I completely believe everything that Kevin has written here and in other posts. He doesn't sound disingenuous at all to me. I just wonder how he has patience to listen to the complaints of the posters here after dealing with owners all day at work. Why does everyone always think that everyone else is trying to fool them on SE? We're all anonymous posters here- what purpose does that serve? I thought that we had more freedom here because we don't know each other so why bother lying? Clearly I'm missing the point. RE2009 tried to close out all the lengthy holiday tipping talk here so let's all help her out.

Sorry for my rant but sometimes I think to myself that all the good discussion here is not worth all the fighting.

Thank you Lobster. I appreciate the post. The main reason I post in these threads is because it seems like im the only one on the other side and I know tenants would like to know how we feel.

thanks lobster, kevin and all the posters that contributed during this process
i think we beat this one to death!!! until next year!!
have a great holiday!!

Have a great holiday too re2009

we have two people (super & porter). we gave them each $125.

oops. i mean $150.

We have about 10 guys (we really like all of them) working in our building. It's about 170 apartments.
Gave all the doormen $75, porter and handyman $60, once a week night shift doorman $35, super $75, mailman $25.

i have a question, are doormen and other building staff in NY paid under the assumption that they will make a significant portion of their income from tips, like waiters?

cc- since RE did not respond to your question i will
she/he did not ask kevin his total comp or his benefits or even his total in tips. she asked the range and what was considered a good tip.
guess it's hard to read when you are so stressed about the small wee wee

We have 16 staff in our building -- gave $50 each for the three concierge we interact the most and gave the cards personally to them. They were very grateful before and after. Gave everybody else $20. I have not really seen more than half of these guys but this was our first time living in a Manhattan apt, so kinda took the consensus from this board to give to everybody.

sorry kevin, if you follow my posts this was completely out of line. guess i was irritated that i gave 1k in tips and it seemed so "expected". amd yes, i do help others in the building with packages because the door guys don't so it just adds insult to injury, i saw julia's post and mine experience so lost it.
the guys in my old building were great... same tips and treated everyone like royalty.

Why did you tip $1000 if you were unhappy?

i went back and forth and back and forth on what to do
in the end i tipped hopping things will improve. it not next year is a different story

because if did not i expected things would be worse!!!
i can't be the smallest tipper- i just can't

I tipped the part-time live-in super $200 -------- half to thank him for always doing a good job and half to "buy" him so he'll be on my side in the future. Mine's a small bldng --- 60 units. His reaction: a simple thanks.
It's always hard to figure out what to give --------- and because the recipients are as varied as the givers, there's no way in tarnation this can be codified in any way, shape, or form. You've got to just go with your gut after you've obsessed about it for a long time.
But it's also important to tip throughout the year and to make sure you are good to the building workers. As long as you do that, you will not feel the intense pressure at the Dec.Jan. holiday frenzy. IMHO.

$100 for the porters, $120 for the doormen, $200 to the live-in super. $50 for each of the guys in the garage (I only take my car out twice a month or so). About $1,500 in total.

There are two staff members in our building, a live-in superintendent and his assistant, and there are approximately 25 apartments. I gave the superintendent a $100 and his assistant $50.

I voted not to eliminate a position within our building during last month's budget meeting for 2010.

That's "tip" enough.

We have 4 Handymen, 10 Doormen, and 13 Porters( Porters do not take packages to your door). We have almost 600 units in our bldg. Handymen got $10 each, (I really tip them when they come to the apt), doorman get $15 -$35 each and Porters get $10 each. We tipped out close to $400, and that's before postman, newspaper guy, maid and garage attendant. I figure if each unit in the bldg tips at average of $15 per individual, that's $9,000 per individual bonus. We have a 1 bedroom we pay $2,750 for. I think a $9K bonus is pretty good if your working in a bldg making $50-$100K per year. Happy to hear feedback.

Bubbles, I was thinking about what you wrote earlier today about being upset after giving $1,000 in tips for poor building service because that is what is expected from tenants and how you feel is very understandable. The building that I lived in before my current building had terrible building staff with the exception of one doorman and one porter and I also resented having to give tips for poor service. Like yourself, I couldn't not tip but I didn't give most of the staff good tips. I knew that it wouldn't improve their service towards me and it bothered me to give a good tip for bad service. Hope this helps.

Matt, I'm glad to hear you voted to save someone's job. Yes, that was good of you.

Rental building, over 100 apartments including 20% low income. Building is clean and good condition. I am single, don't ask for much at all from employees. 10 employees from super to concierges to porter, everyone $50 from me.

33 people... tipped 30 for those i didn't know and 50 for the 10 or so i did know and super. new to the bldg so it's hard for me to tell who does what and such, so next year i will probably tip the same or less depending on what i learn over the next 12 months.

Im simply astounded at the level people tip. Wow. I had no idea. Are these tips totallying 1000 or more typical or is se is a particularly generous group of people. I haven't lived through a xmas in nyc very many times due to frequent overseas transfers, living in corporate apartments, etc

oops, the garage. I didn't tip the guys at the garage. Should I expect a bag of poo on the drivers seat next time I pick my car up?

jim, don't think it's astoundingly generous people here. I think there are cheap people and people who feel like they should tip in every group. Among my friends, it's pretty standard to go 50/each if it keeps it under $1000. I would have loved to go 50 each in my bldg, but 1650+120 for my secretary + 50 for mail guy + 50 for cleaning staff at work woulda been too much, so i shaved a few hundred off the building total by going 30 on the 22 people i didn't know who aren't the super.

We did our usual $200 for the super and $100 for each of the other six guys. (Down one from last year.)

Was going to jack it up to $2K total (the maintenance) but cheaped out in the end, as spouse was complaining the housing account was getting low.

Hey Jim we used to have a lady tip extremely high. I know of at least 6 guys who used to recieve a thouand or more from her. I myself once received $600 from her. Unfortunately for her Madoff got to her. She must have spent over 10k on xmas for the staff.

I wound up giving $300 total for my big Glenwood rental with ~20 workers. That's all I could get myself to give without vomiting.

any particular reason for the vomit at $301?

riversider.

bubbles: $300 was what I thought I could give without feeling angry at how tight money is for me and how I scrimp on things. Truth be told, I'm angry at having to give anything more than a few dollars to the few people who actually do anything for me. I resent the shakedown process of living in fear of what they'll do to me (or more importantly what they won't do for me) should I not tip.

Oh well, one more reason to remind me why I'll be moving out of NYC as soon as I can!

NYC....I just don't get all this angst alot of people have about tipping. You would really have to move to Europe to escape it though.
I feel that everyone should do what they can afford, even a small thought is fine. If you can't afford that, a thank you is nice too.
Give or don't give....but please, all this agonizing is ridiculous!!! Everyone will still do their job and not hold anything against you!

I gave around $700 total to a staff of around 15, where i have the smallest apt in the building. 20-100, for a very few, including the super who never smiles and has done nothing for me. Was afraid to give him less. Going to tip the super across the street for being really very helpful with a car incident. Unbelievable. I envy all the people giving 350 a pop to various employees. This whole thing makes me crazy.

gaongaon - u paid too much. should have done 20 for most. give more only if u acrually liked someone

Prada: depends on the "model" you believe in. Do you purchase service and a more servile attitude with $ or do you not tip for $ (as in Europe) and get the service to match? Not an issue in Asia, strangely.

i lived in euro and LOVED not tipping. You paid for something and you received it. If you wanted something better you paid a higher price. I tip because it is the practice and i accept it as part of living in nyc. I guess $100 and a personal note does not fly because i just got the cold shoulder, and the usual dazed and confused look from the part time doorman/maint guy (only gave him $40).
oh well. disappointing but that's life.
btw- i saw one of the maint guys driving a BMW convertible this weekend.

Kevin, two questions as you are our "source" :-).
Is is the norm for a couple or family to tip more then a single, or even a bigger unit. Also, is the pay better at more upscale buildings or is it strictly based upon seniority??
thanks again!

i just want to say that kevin is one of the nicest and most genuine people on this board, and he offers a unique perspective that I for one appreciate. thank you kevin.

"Everyone will still do their job and not hold anything against you!"

LOLOLOLOL!!!!!

What color is the sky in your world, Alice?

"oops, the garage. I didn't tip the guys at the garage. Should I expect a bag of poo on the drivers seat next time I pick my car up?"

Of course not.

They'd never be able to rent your car out to illegal aliens when you're not using it if there's poo in the driver's seat!

Garage: $40 each of 5 guys, $75 manager and $60 asst. manager. Must have been the right amount because all have been especially nice and accommodating since. FWIW, I don't tip during the year when I come and go from the garage about 2x a week.

That's nice, Kyle.

They're still renting your car out, however.

$1600 for staff of 20.
Average was at $70

Average in the building per doorman $40 (I been told by door man)

No difference in attitude or service. Next year I will tip the building average.

We live in a condo close to the NY Stock exchange. There were 20 staff in total. We paid $75 - $100 for the concierge, $60 for the doorman, $100 for the handyman, $40 for the porter. We didn't tip the late night shift staff. Everyone who works in this building are professional and friendly, they would even say, "You don't necessary have to do it" when I asked them for tipping guidance, but of course, they're just trying to be polite. I give what I can afford and what I am comfortable with, as long as you feel happy about it. Hope that helps.

We've always been greeting and smiling to the staff every time we see them in the lobby, etc. since we moved here and they've always been nice except for maybe one who barely acknowledges us, but that's not my problem. So when we gave the holiday tip, they're quite grateful. I would guess that if we did not give any, we'll probably get the same treatment. It's not like we've been causing troubles, and besides from few packages, dry cleaning and sending people upstairs, we've been low maintenance. I am quite surprised about people who gave a lot and did not seem to have been properly acknowledged and thanked accordingly. I thinks it's an outrage. We did give personally to the people we know though and did wish them personally as opposed to just dropping the cards in a box or something. Either that or this is just one of the nice buildings with nice people. :)

BTW, I also love when tips are already built on the price.

RE 2009 That is an interesting question. I would have to say that most of the tenants in the larger apartments do tip higher. As for single vs family/couple its hard to tell because there arent many single people in the building. By the way, I think its disgusting that you gave the doorman 100 dollars with a personal note and he gave you the cold shoulder. Hopefully, his mind was somewhere else at that moment and he will properly thank you later. For you to take the time to actually put the personal note instead of just the money says a lot and means a lot to some. When I get a note that points out how they feel about me and how they view my performance it really makes my day.

Glamma thank you so much for the kind words. Have a great day and a wonderful new year.

"I would guess that if we did not give any, we'll probably get the same treatment."

If that were REALLY the case with building staffs, no one would feel compelled to "tip" in the first place.

RE2009 Forgot to answer your question about pay. In 32BJ union building all workers receive the same pay after 2 and a half years. Before that they receive 80 percent of full pay. Oh the handymen make about a dollar or so more per hour and the building manager/super pay can greatly vary depending on the building.

Hey Re 2009. We used to have guys that worked in the building who drove fancy cars. Dont let it fool you these are the same guys who dont have a penny to there name. They buy 200 dollar jeans, eat takeout everyday and dont even have the money for rent on time.

NYCMatt, from the first time we moved in and even when we had no idea this was a custom here, we already knew that we will be giving holiday "gifts", we just did not know how we will go about doing it. And esp when we found there are 16 staff in the building. In any case, people we interact the most were definitely getting something. We did not really think of it as bribing anybody, it's more of an appreciation. I think the only difference was that we ended up giving to everybody even the ones we have not met because that seemed to be the tradition. As I said, in our particular case, I did not think the treatment would have changed. So we always greet and smile to them, will they stop acknowledging us back? They actually seem to appreciate the greetings and such, and we just don't pass them by.

It maybe different for other people, but our intention from the beginning was different and it's not to buy anyone because I do agree with you, that's what they're paid for. Besides, what are they gonna do? Not give us our package? Not send guest/delivery upstairs? Then they won't be doing their jobs, people will start moving out, and then they'll start laying off people.

oh the humanity...

i ended up tipping $50 to everyone (from porter up to super) in my 150 unit condo building, with a staff of approximately 14 people. all seemed appreciative, and i expect similar treatment to that which i received for the prior 9 months of my living in the building

today i received a thank you note from one of the doorman... it was short and sweet but i really appreciated it and thought it was a very classy move.