One Listing, Six Typos

"quiet" should have been "quite", for consistency. Too bad there's no dinning room.

To be a Re Borker, you don't need any High School degree, you just need to be a good liar.

Or a bad liar.

I see this kind of copy all too often. What the hell do the sellers think when they look up their apartment and get a load of this? I have noticed in the past that the agents don't correct them and two months later the same mistakes. I have always been told that this is especially amusing to the corporate types from other cities that are told that they have to move here and work at the "flagship" for two years so that they can see how business really works. I suppose when they go back home, they tell their staff to use spell check. In this case; here is a property going for nearly 4 Million and this is the copy? Pitiful.

Priced correctly, you could write it up in Swahili and it'd sell.

Hell, a monkey in a suit could sell something priced correctly. Even though I hate borkers, I'd buy one thru one of THEM if it was priced right.

When's the OH? I need to embrace that floor.

no malthus. it will embrace YOU.

In its wide blankness? Oh my.

Every time I look at it I find more typos. Was it written by a sixth grader? I understand that not everyone can master the rules of grammar (myself included: my mom scolded me the other day for "different than") but you have to wonder if she even read over this before she posted it. That should be a firing offense.

I take this seriously. This is what decent brokers have to shoulder when they don't see that the mention of the profession is that "knowing glance" made by those who have no respect for them. And.....get this, in my travels all over this country, it is the Real Estate Professional who is the pillar of the community. They are respected becuase the area is too small to be sloppy or smarmy. I find that ironic and my hat is off to the serious brokers in NYC. This is nothing new as the good brokers have had to constantly prove themselves as a result of the marginal types who are money crazy without quality or integrity.

Tee hee.

So many brokers in NYC are so so bad...

Hard not to be ashamed of your profession if you are one of the good ones (of which there are also many).

The guy who wrote that description is a product of the Housing Bubble!
He's one of the thousands who dropped out of school when they realized they could make as much money in selling Real Estate as being an attorney without the burden of studying and/or taking a heavy School loan!
Motherfvcker could talk, motherfvcker could smile, mothefvcher could even dress up nice! And that's all he thought he needed to be the King of the World!

What's really sad is that (I think) big brokerages hire writers to come up with this crap ... it's not just the illiterate, uneducated RE agent who had to drop out of school after the 5th grade to help support her family, but a separate writer who was hired solely for this part of the job (I think).

Also, in the second to last sentence, If your looking should read If you're looking. And yes typos are one of my pet peeves in a listing. If I like the apartment enough though I will email the listing agent and tell them about it.

Creel:

plural/singular
typos are / one of my

singular/plural
the listing agent / tell them

“If your looking", STOP, I can't take anymore! Last year on some magazine show there was a woman in NJ who got paid huge money to write the high-end advertising for Real Estate sales in Manhattan and it was stated that she changed everything (copy-wise) and was being imitated. Obviously, not by all. I am nostalgic for the typos of yester-month such as: "enjoy your morning curp of coffee" or my favorite "cheaper then rent". Don't these sales people know someone who is a writer? Remember when every building had at least one in residence?

Thank you Alan, I should have clarified agents or switched them to her/him. But I shudder to think that typos are one of my pet peeves is a typo because the verb is referring to the typos and not to myself.

It is too bad I had to drop out of school after the sixth grade!

And that is why you never critacize grammer on the internet - your gauranteed to right a few typos of you're own.

Nobody on this blog is marketing a $3.5Millions apt.

I am always amazed at the number of typos seen in RE listings. Pure sloppiness. If I were a seller, I'd expect that copy to be flawless.

You are very right sledge, I'm not. In fact, there's a good reason for that. I'm not a broker.

HR, my last comment was directed to wellheythere

"Nobody on this blog is marketing a $3.5Millions apt."

Dont bee a hippocrit.

Update: I have emailed the broker via the website. I have not received a comment back as of two hours ago. Please keep checking the original listing to see if any of the typos were corrected.

Well he's still missing some hyphens and the copy is still choppy but at least he's no longer touting the 'blank' floors. Oh, and by the way, Mr. Broker--no need to capitalize the word Cherry.

And kitchen should be lower-case as well. I never understand the over-use of capitalization evident in so many listings. What's the point? Or are the writers just ignorant?

Or German?

Sorry--I see it's Ms. Broker, not Mr.
Apologies.

Bad ads used to make me nuts, but I've mellowed.

We've all seen god-awful writing where we'd least expect it, so I don't hold brokers to a higher standard than everybody else, and this particular ad is no worse than hundreds of others.

The big houses hire proofreaders for their glossy inserts in the NYT, but leave brokers to their own devices for plain old web copy. Some can be trusted, others can't.

Those of us with control issues would edit our brokers' copy anyway.

The real question is, would a potential buyer who knew the difference between French doors and windows, or between honed and polished marble, be put off by the errors and not go see the place?

The real question is, would a potential buyer who knew the difference between French doors and windows, or between honed and polished marble, be put off by the errors and not go see the place?

They would not be put off any more than say, the broker using Crayons to sign the contract.

If a broker is this sloppy while preparing this apartment description, then how can they be trusted to manage more significant details regarding the apartment itself?

Additionally, this sort of sloppiness gives me the impression that buyers of $3.5M apartments don't seem to care how little attention a broker may or may not pay to a property. Maybe that is what happens when they are buying these multi-million dollar places from their petty cash accounts.

Have we really gotten to the point where there is so much dumb money out there that an ad for a $3.5M apartment can be written by a 5th grader and no one but a bunch of grammar freaks seem to care? Try to invest $3.5 in any other asset market and see if you are initially greeted by such mistakes and errors.

To me, this is just another example of how the NYC RE market has turned into amateur hour for a bunch of spoiled and clueless buyers (ponzi scheme "winners") that could care less about risk or professionally investing their money - most likely b/c they made/received their money without worrying about that in the first place.

WELL! memito just called us "grammar freaks"! Actually, given the discussion, it could be a good thing.

Half-serious question: if brokers are as useless as some claim they are, does their spelling matter? (think of it as "if a tree falls in the woods" for the bubble age).

NWT. Would places not sell wo brokers? Cars sell on ebay..... 6%.... My wife doesn't charge 6% of your net worth to treat cancer, wtf does a 4th grade grammar fktard get to charge me 6%? Never ever ever been impressed by a borker. I feign politeness.... And use them as car salesman, an obstacle that needs to be moved gingerly lest I hurt their tiny feelings.

I'd say being a fully-literate broker is its own reward, as none of them are getting gold stars for it, and those who don't know any better don't seem to be penalized for it.

They can't win either way. Take Brian Lewis, who apparently likes to write ad copy and makes no blunders. He's nevertheless been pilloried here for not being stodgy in his writing.

Location
# rooms
Price
Common charges
Last sold price

Everything else is just wasted bullshit.... The fact any borker thinks a copy or their 'market' savvy adds any value is just Fking retarded. Fktarded if you will.

Tiny hearts. Tiny brains. Tiny ambitions. Tiny accomplishments. Yep, just about sums it up.

Here's a FSBO ad that came up on another thread: http://streeteasy.com/nyc/sale/601364-coop-111-west-94th-street-upper-west-side-new-york

Nothing glaringly wrong, but then you'd have to read it all to be sure. Too long-winded, maybe? I'm not looking, so no judge.

"Grammar freaks" are great... at least they pay attention to details....

We have transformed our economy into one that is full of "rules" but devoid of real consequences for the upper economic echelon. There is a serious disconnect regarding how the world's elite is making and spending money simply because they don't care about inevitable impact on their societies as a whole - mostly because it has become evident that they will be bailed out over and over if necessary.

Why should they worry about how they make money and spend it if there are no traditional economic consequences. Why should they worry about spelling or procedure or details when they buy a $3.5M apartment? (Of course they pretend to... they have their lawyers, inspectors and so-forth go over such purchases - but it is within the context of a greater risk picture that they can't identify or analyze because they themselves are such a part of it.)

The point is that due to negative real interest rates worldwide and gov'ts that are willing to bailout the highest end of income earners and their investments, we have created a world where buying a $3.5M apartment in NYC is mundane; so normal that brokers don't need to pay attention to details - such as spelling - because those that are buying these apartments just don't care (as much as they might give the impression they do).

Do you think that Miami condo flippers read over every document detail or cared about spelling back in 2005? Of course not, they were too busy lining up their next sale.

Dumb and easy money have lowered investment standards because they can get away with it up to some point. My problem is when the next breaking point takes place the FED will be powerless and all of this ignorant and blind greed will have potentially created a danger far greater than the economic/financial collapse we saw in 2008.

Maybe NYC RE has always been full of sloppiness and mistakes. But in my book, if you are selling a $3.5M asset, the old-school sophisticated investors demanded a certain amount of professionalism and accuracy in the details.

Clearly, those are not today's standards.

Fsbo. Fk. That's like operating on your brain. You ain't no brain surgeon. Jeeezz. The nerve of someone actually selling re wo a professional.

NWT is a tool.

Wonderful!

The Grammarian approves of this discussion.

Flmao. I'm a stickler for grammar, but not Bc I care but Bc of half wits like NWT who loves to ding ppl. Btw, my mom and
Dad can't speak the king's English for shit nor can they read it or write it. But they both ain't no re borkers. And they carry no airs.

We all bleed the same, but some think they r better than others. It's even funnier when they are borkers. Just stfu and sell that car..... Oh that's right the mkt is slow Bc we r coming off a massive bubble. Wasn't like this in 2006... Didn't even have to do an open house, right? Flmaozzz

You go, Memito. You hit the nail right on the head. From this point on you can call me anything but late for dinner!

Creel - did you email the link to this discussion to the broker?

No.

maybe if the world doesn't end this weekend you could forward it.

"2 Bedrooms and 2 full baths. A windowed Kitchen,..." I just wonder what the broker would say if asked why she capitalized "bedroom" and "kitchen" but not "baths." She isn't a child. I assume she can read. If she can, in fact, read, then she must have observed over the years in books, magazines and newspapers that no one capitalizes the names of rooms. I'd love to know how she decided they should be capitalized. Aren't a lot of words capitalized in German? Maybe she's a native German speaker (yes, you are supposed to capitalize the name of a language). In any event, I'd expect the broker's prose in a short ad to be perfect if I had a $4MM townhouse to sell.

"In any event, I'd expect the broker's prose in a short ad to be perfect if I had a $4MM townhouse to sell."

Right, and my origianl point wsa that when people that I know come to town with money in hand, the above quote is pretty much what they have said to me time and time again. Also, they say that you wouldn't expect this in an upscale market. Even the lesser areas here are upscale compared to the average price elsewhere.

A real estae agent, stereotypically, appears to be more concerned about their "head shot" than grammatical appearance. The listings are accompanied by well executed photographs of the broker - infinitely more professional than the apartment photos or the listing description. Who cares what the apartment looks like - the broker is cute!

Not this one -- she looks like a Weiner.

Her shot is angelic complete with praying hands. Where's the halo? I'm sure I won't be the only one to follow this listing to the bitter end. Can't wait.

I noticed a change from Your to you're but Kylewest brings up some good points. There are still some typos to be had.

http://www.halstead.com/sale/ny/manhattan/west-village/59-barrow-street/1972480

Looks like Ms Weiner got the last laugh! Oh well, I feel that if this thread helped at least on realator to us spell check, then our work is done.

@ Bill: I assume you meant "use spell check," and not "us spell check?"

"realator"? maybe you should have used spellcheck

What a mess! What I need to use are glasses. It's that denial of "oh I can see this".

Bill, I thought you were being sarcastic...

No, just vision impaired. For sarcastic, I need my glasses.

The sloppiness of the description notwithstanding, this really is what I would describe as my "dream" Village apartment.

But no way in hell is it worth $4 million.

No way in hell is it worth $3 million.

No way in hell is it worth $2 million.

MAYBE it's worth a million. At best.

Matt, do you have $1 million?

if a broker can't put a professional listing together, they should be fired immediately.

And when you hire a broker to list your place, and that broker doesn't put together a professional listing, you can and should fire that broker. Immediately.

That weird, intermittent capitalization is a hallmark of old-school brokerage -- one of my sponsoring brokers does it too. He insists that the nonstandard Upper/Lower is very effective... and certainly this listing seems to have been taken into contract rather swiftly.

Perhaps there's something about a capital letter in an unexpected Place that is arresting.

ali r.
DG Neary Realty

matt, clearly you have no clue when it comes to the worth of an apartment. the market spoke, this is obviously worth close to asking. next time say "i wouldnt pay more than".

>>That weird, intermittent capitalization is a hallmark of old-school brokerage <<

Well, unfortunately it makes the writer seem illiterate and not well educated.

What does it mean if someone don't use capitalization on their real name?

It means they are the "sub" in a master/sub sexual relationship.

bramstar
39 minutes ago
ignore this person
report abuse >>That weird, intermittent capitalization is a hallmark of old-school brokerage <<

Well, unfortunately it makes the writer seem illiterate and not well educated

It's advertising. Not a SPELLING BEE. See how I used caps there to emphasize my point? Fairly effective, no?

What does a "SPELLING BEE" have to do with using intermittent capitalization?

Thanks Matt. Interesting.

>>It's advertising. Not a SPELLING BEE. See how I used caps there to emphasize my point? Fairly effective, no?<<

I'm talking about correct use of grammar. Your example is acceptable and correct. The following example is neither acceptable nor correct:

Brand new Kitchen Top of the Line appliances and Views for days!

bramstar
17 minutes ago
ignore this person
report abuse >>It's advertising. Not a SPELLING BEE. See how I used caps there to emphasize my point? Fairly effective, no?<<

I'm talking about correct use of grammar. Your example is acceptable and correct. The following example is neither acceptable nor correct:

Brand new Kitchen Top of the Line appliances and Views for days!

Please find some similar ad copy to the above. NO ONE writes like that. I think even YOU might agree that is a poor example.

Sunday
27 minutes ago
ignore this person
report abuse What does a "SPELLING BEE" have to do with using intermittent capitalization?

6 typos. Spelling. Get it now? Anyway, this broker clearly produced (thought not that hard to do in the West Village), so I think her usage and spelling errors really don't add up to much except some hot air.

"6 typos. Spelling. Get it now?"

Your 'spelling bee' comment was in response to bramstar's comment on use of capitalization. So, no, I don't get it. How are they related?

usage, spelling grammar. one in the same. anyone care to calculate this broker commission on this deal?

>>Brand new Kitchen Top of the Line appliances and Views for days!

Please find some similar ad copy to the above. NO ONE writes like that. I think even YOU might agree that is a poor example.<<

Oh? I beg to differ. This took about two minutes to unearth in a random search, by the way. And there are plenty more where that came from, especially in the rental sector:

http://streeteasy.com/nyc/sale/555776-coop-444-east-84th-street-yorkville-new-york

Jim,

What is your point? The thread just pointed out egregious errors in the copy. I never claimed that the broker was evil or a moron--in fact, I made no claims about her whatsoever. Just showing one of many examples of incredible errors in real estate copy. I can't figure out what has you so excited.

Happy, there's a reason Hones is grayed out and on perma-hide.

This apt looks worth $2.5m to me.

excited?